The balmy breeze caressed my cheek as I looked over the starboard side of the ship. The ship was pulling out of San Juan, Puerto Rico harbor right before the witching hour. A lone glass of champagne with condensed water trickling down its side was my lone companion on deck. I could hear a soulful melody being piped in from one of the speakers.

Most of the people on the ship were previously scurrying aboard the ship and were now in their cabins recuperating from a day on the island of enchantment. I had just joined the cruise here.

This is what granted me a solitary moment of peace on the upper deck of the ship. From here I could see the darkened waters that lay before me and the sparkling lights I was leaving behind. It seemed I was all alone under a low hanging sky of an almost a deep purple and I could touch the stars if I desired.

Yet that was an illusion. On the deck below me another solitary figure was holding court. The man was standing so still he seemed to be a statue in the stillness of the night. He was staring at the doors that opened onto the deck with such a gaze that I thought that by his will alone the doors would open.

It appeared he was waiting for someone. Although waiting is a mild word for it, it was more like anxiously anticipating someone’s arrival. Every time the door opened his head snapped to attention, only to be disappointed. Although he had not looked at his watch once during my careful scrutiny, I then noted we were finally of the harbor.

He was a pleasant distraction. I came on this ship alone to gain some perspective. It was a vacation to reacquaint myself a part of me that had long been silent. My boyfriend and I decided to take a hiatus from each other. The question was would we get back together. I lost myself in the would haves and could haves when I felt someone’s eyes trained on my person.

I looked down and the handsome gentleman was motioning to me to join him. I joined him not out of my loneliness but because of the utter despair in his eyes. I reached the lower deck with some flurries of anticipation making themselves felt in the pit of my stomach. Why was I nervous? It wasn’t as if I was looking for a relationship. And for some reason I don’t think he was either.

He walked up to me and said, “Hello, my name is Michael. Would you care to join me for a drink." Speaking in that lovely accented husky voice that I found very attractive.

“My pleasure,” was my response. He led me by placing his hand on my lower back towards the bar. My back slightly jumped at the unexpected touch.

We sat at the bar and he ordered another flute of champagne for me. As we sat there he just looked at me, I could tell he wanted to talk but seemed leery at the prospect.

So not one to be silent for long. I inquired, “Why are you looking so forlorn?”

The question appeared to startle him as his grew wider but then his mask slipped back into place when he replied, “The same could be said of you.”

“Not fair I asked you first.”

“True. So shall we play a game of quid pro quo?”

I thought about that but what could it hurt. I would probably never see him again. Perhaps getting all of this off my chest would make me see things clearer. I took a sip of champagne to fortify myself. “All right you start.”

“I was waiting for someone to board the ship at this port of call but as you can see she did not show,” he said in a downtrodden tone.

“Well, maybe she missed her flight, I said in a hopeful tone.

“No, she would have let me know. If she wanted to be here, nothing could stop her. She has an indomitable will and an untamed spirit.”

“So, the question is why wouldn’t she come?”

“Ah, but that is the next question you may ask. It is my turn. What is your name and why are you here alone?” He smiled at me as he said this.

“Oh, I am sorry, my mother taught me better manners than that. My name is Rita. Then again maybe I didn’t want you to know. Telling things to strangers is so much easier than telling someone who knows you.”

“And…”he prompted to answer him.

I smiled at him and shook my head at him and said, “No, sorry that is two questions, Michael.”

“All right if that is how you wish to play.”

“You made the rules,” I reminded him.

“ She would not come because I have rebuffed her advances several times and I only gave her scraps of my affection when it was convenient for me. She has given me several chances. Perhaps she is teaching me a lesson.” He hung his head down in shame as he said this.

My hand touched his chin and raised his head so that he could look in my eyes. His eyes had unshed tears in them. “There is no need for shame between the two of us. I am not going to judge you and I hope you will return the favor.”

A softly whispered “Thank you,” escaped from his lips. “Your turn.”

“Well, it seems both of us are having relationship problems. I broke up with my boyfriend and came on vacation to gain perspective on the situation. I chose to be alone on this trip.”

There I finally said it and there was no shame in saying it to him. Although I had received some of the weirdest looks when I was booking this trip for myself; it seems no one goes on a cruise by himself or herself. “So why would you treat your woman in that fashion?”

“First, of all no one owns her. Second, she is my humanity. I warm myself by standing at the edges of it. I was lost in an endless night without her. She allows me to feel even if I cannot afford to. My soul had died and she brought it back to life with the light from her soul. I am afraid that if I get too close I will rob her of this humanity and change her. Thereby destroying what I hold so dear.” As he said this you could see the memories flitting across his face and the adoration he felt for this nameless woman. “Don’t you think that is her choice to make? She must know you pretty well to still love you after all you have said you have done. It seems to me she has made her choice.”

“I wonder if we had met in some other fashion would she still feel the same for me. But now it is your turn, why did you break up?”

A bitter laugh escaped my lips. “It seemed I was trapped and he would not allow me to be what I wished to be. He wanted me to conform to his way of thinking. Don’t laugh too loud or wear that color. That is not to say it was all bad but I felt stifled. Then an opportunity presented itself and I had to make a choice whether to stay with him or move and improve my life. I chose to leave and he wanted me to stay.”

He looked at me and noticed that my glass was empty and ordered another one for me. “You know there is always compromise in a relationship.”

“Thank you for the drink.” My finger started tracing the edge of the glass. “Yes, I know but it seems to me that there is always one party that compromises more than the other. Somebody is always giving more. It is the rare relationship in which both parties give and take equally.” I took a gulp of champagne and let the cool liquid turn into a pleasant warmth in my stomach.

I looked at Michael admiring the fine specimen of a male that he was. Those eyes alone were enough to lose yourself in but he also had that voice that made me think of all the naughty things I had done but never confessed. I found it hypnotic but that man was not available at all.

“It is your turn,” he said. Startling me out of my reverie and I glanced away from him, I could feel the heat rising to my cheeks.

“Have you told her how you feel about her?”

“Not in so many words.”

I laughed. “What a typically male response. Do you think she is psychic? There is only so much a glance can convey. Women need to hear the words you know.”

“But I have shown her that, I have done things for her that I would do for no other.” He tried to defend himself.

“That doesn’t matter if she doesn’t know that you would not do those things for just anyone.” I shook my head. “I think you guys need a class in communication.”

“If she were here right now would you tell her how you feel?”

He paused and looked up at the night sky. Suddenly the boat slightly moved to the left. It felt like we brushed against something or something brushed against us.

“Let’s see what happened,” he said. His attitude suddenly became alert and tense. We walked to the side of the boat and looked over the side. There was a speedboat with a passenger climbing up the side of the ship where the crewmembers were waiting to help.

At first glance I thought it was a man dressed in a black jumpsuit and hood. Then the hood fell back and a cascade of blond tresses tumbled down her back She looked up directly at Michael. I saw a pair of electric blue eyes that held a look of grave concern.

Visually stunning were the words that popped into my head. That had to be her. Well, that is the end of my evening with Michael. He definitely had better things to do.

“Well, Michael, it was nice talking to you but I believe you are going to have your hands full. I am very happy for you. Just remember to tell her.” I smiled brightly at him.

I began to walk away when he grabbed my hand and kissed it. “Thank you for listening.”

Too bad he was taken. He had the softest lips, I can just imagine how he kisses.

“No problem, that is what strangers are for.” At that I turned and returned back up to my perch on the top deck. I had to see the reunion. Okay so I am nosy, sue me.

He waited again at the bar with what I considered inhuman patience. Then the doors opened out came the beautiful woman. They gazed at each other for what seemed to like an eternity. Maybe you can convey everything in a gaze. She held out her hand to him and he trailed his finger up her arm.

Michael took her hand and pulled her to him for a quick embrace. He held her close and then slightly pulled away. He then framed her face with his hands and whispered in her ears. She pulled away from him and looked at him in disbelief. Then she smiled and nodded. They left together arm in arm under that beautiful sky.

They showed me that night that love does turn out right sometimes.

The End

This story copyright © 1999, Rita/Tasamin